06.12.18 – Berlin
Strange things happen.
Like a year ago one of my best friends got himself a baby boy.
At the age of roughly 30 years old.
It seems to be a normal age, but if you look carefully you ask yourself.
Where would I have been 10 years ago.
when I faced the dicision of becoming a father 2008.
I freaked out, I panicked. And said to my self. Fucked I can´t end up like this.
Doing the same old boring job I´m just doing until I retire.
The hardest lesson back then was, to accept the things you can´t change.
It is even super hard to remember this time back then.The situation I was in.
I hoped and prayed that It wouldn´t happen, that I´m to young to be a father.
Not now.
I did´nt wanted to be this version of a father.
Now analyzing, just to be the best father I can imagine. All it takes be excatly like my old man.
Seriously, he is one of the greatest human beings I know.
He is always there, if you got an issue or problem. Or even the dumbest ideas. He don´t care.
And thru that he taught me so much.
Support makes all the difference.
If though its so hard for me to actually tell him, that he means so much to me.
Cause I´m quite not good with expressing my feelings. Like saying I love you. Or in German Ich liebe dich Vater. (SOunds so gay. And why gay – because those are the only man that fought for their right to express their feelings.
So what makes a good father.
#1 Always be there for you. – Support you, no matter what.
That is basically the only thing he needs to do.
First he cares, than he provides, than he supports, than he celebrates what you do.
Father, Supporter, Friend, Fan.
Baby, Child, Teen, Adult.
This is maybe why I´m so drawn to Casey Neistat.
We share the same passion. But with one major difference.
He got his baby when he was 17 years old.
And turned out great.
I should have gotten my first kid, when I was 22 years old.
I mostly turned out ok. (at least by my standards.)
But one thing I actually did.
I stayed by my promise. If that kid – becoming a father thing wouldn´t happen.
I have to do some drastic changes to my life.
So I quite my job and moved to Australia. Back than a thing I may just would have dreamed about in my wildest dreams.
I would have never actually have the guts to do it.
And B. I would have been to old.
A Gap Year or a Work n Travel. so many people do these days.
Or are they?
May I´m just in the bubble.
And to clear things up for you.
What is normal? I got a definition for you.
If 80% of your social environment do it or have done it. Its normal.
So for example, I had my first car, when I was 18. That was normal amongst my friends.
Not so much in India, or even for the kids in Berlin.
So how many teens actually go to Australia?
There are 2,63 Million Teenagers, Adults between the Age of 18-20 in Germany. (Link)
How many of them actually go to Australia?
From 2,63 Million, to be NOT the norm, the other 20%. It would be 472.000 people.
(by the way, 27% of all Germans, would have loved to go to Australia – Link)
But in numbers. The total of people who have entered Australia on a Work N Travel Visa was 321.000
AS OF THE WHOLE WORLD! (Link)
57,000 from the UK,
35,200 from Korea,
and 33,600 from Germany
So from all the 472.000 germans, that would be the not normal. Only 33.600 actually go.
That makes 1,27%!!!!! Think of that, not being the the Norm. Being part of the 1%.
And if you check facts, how many people do you know in your social surround that went?
Probably not 80%.
The thing is after you have done it, you get into a filter bubble of your own. You only surround yourself with the like minded people that have done it.
Its weird, but after Australia, I went on and studied International Business. And guess what with alot of people that have also been in Australia before.
That my friend is called real life confirmation bias. You talk to one, two, three people all have been there, the ines you haven´t become irrelavant.
And all of a sudden it becomes the norm. (Even if it isn´t, even if you are just surround by your own 1%.) Willkommen am Futtertrog, Son.
And all of things bring me to what?
Could I have been one of the 1% even if I didn´t had to vote for not becoming an early father?
How would my Life have been like? Did I still would have gone?
I know, that we have probably have broken up sooner or later. Since to get someone pregnant, before you even count up the first month. Is pretty stressful.
I was a late bloomer and further more just happy to get laid at all.
So maybe in a Business Sense and keeping of Focus on things to improve my Life would have been a lot stiffer.
I would still have made trips. But seriously not this kind of.
–
But to not get upset by all this. I´m happy with my Life and how it turned out so far.
Not Perfect. But Fuck Perfection, right.
It all could have gone also totally the opposite. Just because I´m sitting right here, right now. Doesn´t mean I could have ended up happier if I have taken the other route.
Imagine I would have stayed at the old company. Maybe I would have been a successfull dude at the moment. But if you don´t chase your dreams, you will always be a loser, I guess.
Winners are those, who are crazy enough, to actually take the risk. And play against the odds.
I will never be able to tell how I would have ended up, becoming a father 10 years ago.
But I can tell that I will always try to play against the odds and chase the crazy vision, idea or dream.
WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN THE POINT OTHERWISE.